6 behaviours to cut out to create happiness

Carolyn PERFORM, Uncategorized Leave a Comment

You’re not totally happy because…

Some people would rather be miserable. But not you. 

But only if you just had a little more time or money to do the things you want, then you’d be happy-er right? But that’s never gonna happen. So now what? Check Mate.

Everyone says they want to be happy, but few really understand what happiness is (i’m not a robot, i’m still working on it too!) Happiness has been misinterpreted as an endless euphoria, where nothing ever goes wrong and magic pixies float through the sky. Society tells you:  ‘Buy this!’ or  ‘Do that!’  Then you’ll be happy.  You need a bigger house, a new car.  Or your partner needs to be better at this or that.  More.  More.  More.

So, what if More doesn’t = Better?  And what if Better doesn’t = Happy?

Happiness isn’t about having more or doing better, but rather doing less, so you can magnify what makes you truly happy.
So here are 6 things to CUT OUT of your life, creating space in your life to make room for happiness:

1.  Toxic, energy sapping people

You know that over time, you become your environment right? And that includes your “friends.” Choose ’em wisely. Who’s on your bus? Are they making your journey more pleasurable? It takes courage to distance yourself from people that you may have become used to, but devoting your precious time to energy sappers isn’t worth missing out on happiness for. Notice the alarm bell. Let them get off at the next stop…ding ding!

2.  Media Overload

Many people cut ties with the news and media altogether to avoid the negativity.  I remember taking a red marker pen to a newspaper and circling all the negative articles. By the time I was done, the entire newspaper was red. I’ve never read a newspaper since.
I’m still informed on what’s going on the world. I just don’t need it constantly.

Try a media detox:
a.  If it’s that important, you’ll hear about it.
b.  Set a time limit on Facebook etc. Do a facebook “cull” of anyone who fits the description of entry No1 above.

3.  Suppressing Emotions

A huge myth about happy people is that they feel happy 100% of the time and never experience anything other than pure joy.
The truth about happy people is they experience all emotions just like every other person. It’s just that they are able communicate how they feel in a trusting and authentic way, without blame or guilt. They let their emotions show and trust that, by expressing that feeling, it will pass. And when it does, they move on. Expressing yourself releases the emotion and allows happiness levels to come back into focus.

4.  Four-Wall Syndrome

“Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.” – Albert Einstein

The longer you keep yourself cooped inside all day, the harder it is to get the motivation to step outside.  Surrounding yourself by walls in the physical world builds up emotional walls and eventually gives you a severe dose of cabin fever.
So, take that meeting outside. Walk and talk. Eat al fresco and enjoy nature regularly, everyday.

 

5.  Staying At A Job You Hate

It’s hard to be happy when you spend 40+ hours a week at a job you can’t stand.  It’s even harder to be happy when you can’t afford to leave. It’s odd to say, but it’s perfectly normal to hate your job, many do.  Chances are you aren’t in the position to quit today and find a new one, either. It’s okay to hate your job right now, it’s not okay to hate your job 20 years from now and still be at the same place.
Commit to an exit date in the future, if you are still in your dead end job after that day comes, you only have yourself to blame.
(If you don’t like that idea, then maybe it’s not the job – maybe it’s YOU! Time for some self development perhaps? I know of a particularly good team of people to help with that exact topic. Check out our “work with us” page and book your coach.)

15.  Taking Life Too Seriously

Put simply for you,  we live and then we die, and if you did things right, you had a lot of fun in-between.  That’s all life really is.  A place for us to hangout and experience some amazing things on this place we call Earth.

We make things way more complicated than they need to be.  When you let go of all seriousness the pressure is off.  “The world surely needs more laughers” as a dear friend often says. (The last time I checked in on her, she was zip lining across the Zambezi River aged 60+) I’ll be happy to take a leaf out of her book!

So if anything, let go of all those thoughts that simply get in the way of your happiness.
And, by the way, when you do decide to let go, there probably won’t be any fanfare or media announcement to celebrate your happy-ness. You’ll just know. And you’ll smile. To yourself.

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